Tuesday, September 20, 2011

The Magical Moroccan Maids

"How do you get a Saudi woman to do housework?"
"Suggest hiring a Moroccan house maid."

Saudi families cannot seem to function without their maids. Usually maids were hired from Philippines and Indonesia to live with the Saudi employers. The government has now halted Philippinas, Sri Lankans and Indonesians from coming due to disputes over their salaries and working conditions.

Recently making headlines are the Moroccan maids that have been among the nationalities suggested to replace the lost workforce from the Asian market. It appears that when it comes to housemaids, nationality does matter. Saudi women have united themselves for the cause of banning Moroccan maids. Many Saudi women went so far as the Shoura council with their complaints and concerns over the issue.

So why are Saudi women so adamant on banning Moroccan women from working in their homes uncovered, mixing with their menfolk?

The answer according to Saudi women is "they are too beautiful" and apparently, also practice black magic and sorcery.
Therefore they are potential threats, after all they might cast a spell on their husbands, either with their looks or with their magician skills.

Moroccan women possess many other qualities that are behind Saudi wives concerns. The image Saudis tend to have of Moroccan women is:
  • they are voluptuous and fair-skinned
  • masters of belly-dancing 
  • are flirty and "easy"
  • they are good in bed
  • great cooking skills
Morocco is a popular holiday destination among Saudi men. Some Saudi men have even come home with a young Moroccan second wife in tow. 

Saudi women do have some valid points of concern, however have they forgotten their own assets and good qualities? Saudi women are among the most beautiful women in the world. They are elegant, intelligent and fun to be with. Many have university degrees. Saudi women don't give themselves enough credit and they think the worst of their spouses.

If a man is going to cheat with a maid, he will do it with the Philippina or Ethiopian maid too. Just because the maid is Moroccan it's not going to make all Saudi men go wild and start cheating on their wives or proposing to the maids.

The solution to the worry of the Saudi women is simple: Don't hire a maid from Morocco if her presence in your house will cause so much distress. 

That opens up another discussion, why are these foreign women allowed to live with unrelated males in the first place? Is Saudi-Arabia not based on gender segregation? How come it's ok for gender mixing to happen in the most private and intimate places of society, the Saudi homes? Is gender segregation just for looks?

Perhaps the concerned Saudi women could consider doing the housework themselves and get rid of these foreign women in their houses once and for all. Teaching children to do house chores would do a lot of good too. Why not cook a delicious meal for the husband? Are the maids really even necessary, honestly speaking? How do women in other countries manage?

The dilemma of the Magical Moroccan maids can easily be solved.

Discussion on Tara's blog about the issue here
My previous post on housemaids in Saudi:http://blueabaya.blogspot.com/2011/07/housemaids-villains-or-victims.html


Chick Flick Journal said...

its not only Saudis who can't function without maids its the whole gulf and whatever you wrote about Morracans is true:p

TRG said...

Excellent post Laylah! You made the right decision to post this anyway because it is filled with good points from top to bottom masha'Allah. I amended my Moroccan maid post on FHWS to include yours as further reading.

I think there will be power struggles between the woman of the house and the hired help, in this case the Saudi wife and Moroccan maid. The woman of the house will not want to be showed up and have her position/role in the house threatened. Factor in the superiority complex that Saudi women seem to have which I think is also related to insecurity. A Muslim man can have up to 4 wives and most of the Saudi women today do not want to be in a polygamous marriage. They are very much aware that their husband can marry a 2nd, 3rd, 4th time without requesting the permission of the 1st wife AND it is allowed for them to keep the marriage(s) a secret from her and his other wives. The wife also knows that her husband can simply divorce her and replace her with another woman.

If you have a solid marriage and trust your husband, you would not be worried. But if you're gonna be this way then you should clean your own house and take care of your own children!

Anonymous said...

Moroccan maids will surely cause unease in any woman not just Saudis because if those women pictured are Moroccan I have to say they are strikingly beautiful. Have not ever seen a Saudi woman to compare though.
Women here in the west go to work and take care of the house and children but men help them. We teach our children to participate in everything around the house so we don't need these maids.I was taught from young age to do my share and as a man now I at least know how to help my wife. Maybe that's the problem here its the lazy Saudi men not the women?


Anonymous said...

I totally agree with you. For once they should start moving their lazy bodies!

Anonymous said...

In South Africa most people have maids, but only to clean. Most women(who don't work full time) will cook and look after their own children,men also help with chores.It is better as the cleaner does not intefere with the family life,and she can work for different families on different days of the week and earn more money.

Anonymous said...

We have been wondering this subject and asking, why on earth do the Saudi women need maids if they are housewifes? Millions of housewifes all over the world, including myself, do all the housework and cook several course meals at least twice a day. Many women also work outside home and have to do all that housework and cooking in the few free hours that they have after work. None would even think of the possibility to have a maid. It is excessive luxury that only some rich people can have, and even many of them don't want or need houseworkers. I also think that most husbands would prefer to eat meals cooked by their own wifes, and children raised by them and not some people who they hardly know. My personal opinion is that if a woman has the possibility to be a housewife, she should do all the housework and cooking. Most people take it for granted, I wasn't even thinking of this subject until I read it from blogs and Saudi news..!

Steve said...

Mmmm.... that first photo does it for me, with the lady in blue. Morocco interests me already!

Anon @ 1.19 AM. I have to agree with you. Living in a country where everybody has to be paid more or less the same wage, maids & domestic servants are only for the super-rich.
Nobody else can afford it.

It boggles my mind that people have domestic servants. Cannot imagine it.

Anonymous said...

Can not agree more . Just get up and do your own chores. Tell your children to pick up after themselves and most important ask the men to lend a hand. How can you decided to get workers from a country based on their looks why does this even matter. So dont get maids from Morocco cause ther are beautiful. SO you are saying Asian people are not beautiful???? There is seriously something wrong with this discussion.Most interestingly women stood up against getting maids from Moroco but they wont stand up for their right to drive or vote or work or get other equal oppurtunities why?????
Good post had me thinking on many different levels.

Jennifer said...

All I can say is LOL

Anonymous said...

Maybe Saudi women can opt to buy an irobot to do the chores :) Its affordable and nice :) About the maid part, I don't think I would be comfortable staying with a maid and I agree as a woman, we should raise our kids by our hands and also cook for the family :) It's one of the loveliest thing to do :)

Layla said...

Thanks everyone for the comments!Apologies for not being able to reply sooner because of technical issues in Turkey.
I'm surprised not many Saudi women commented on why they really NEED their maids, especially those that live in their houses.

CFJ-you are right, its not only a Saudi related problem, the whole Gulf is totally dependent on their maids.

Tara brought up a good point about the maids and their "madams" having power battles, this would not happen as easily with the more docile Asian maids.

J-I agree with you, it might have something to do with lazy saudi men as well, perhaps the women are so overburdened with their demands they need maids to handle the houshold and keep the men happy(and not search for second wives)

Layla said...

Steve- maybe you understand the concern of the Saudi women then? :D
Do you think if live in maids were more affordable elsewhere, they would be more popular in western societies as well?

Layla said...

Mona-good point, I was also left wondering that is this such a major issue it causes a movement and women to contact Shoura, but on other issues(women driving), they remain silent and passive..

Another thing one can read between the lines is that Saudi women do not in general feel threatened by the Asian maids or consider them attractive enough to distract their husbands.

Layla said...

gawjusgurl-well said, we are all beautiful despite skin colors and nationalities and hair colors!
I really think it comes down to Saudi women being too insecure about themselves!

Layla said...

Jennifer, thanks for stopping by glad you had a LOL moment :)

C-I love your idea of the irobot!!What great business potential it has :D

Anonymous said...

Iam a Saudi woman and I have always had maids and not ever any problems.my chilren has maids too.I dont see a problem if I want to relax and do other things for me like stay beautiful.my husband gives me the maids because he loves me. Maybe in america husbands dont love the wife so much and makes her do everything.I think these are just jealous women that wants also to have maids but dont have money!!

Steve at the Pub said...

Laylah, without any doubt, were maids affordable EVERYONE would have one.
One of the side effects (or is it the other way around?) of a Liberal Democracy is the flattening of personal income.
This can be the biggest shock for middle class people who migrate to a liberal democracy. They have to give up so many aspects of their lifestyle, and comply with so many pettifogging rules.

Anonymous said...

Just my input:

1. No, not everyone wants a maid. I certainly don't. I want to raise my own kids. My daughter wouldn't be the wonderful, well-mannenered and confident child she is without my guidance and love. Why have children if you are going to pay someone else to care for them 24/7? Status? Social expectations? Believe me, I am not the least jealous of Saudi women. Actually I am very happy and contect that I am neither Saudi nor born/living there. :)
2. I think I have more potential, intelligence and desire for self-fullfillment than to let my husband be my whole life and my only goal to fulfill his desires and whishes... I feel insulted on so many levels only to think about a life where I would be practically useless as soon as my beauty and libido would decrease...
3. In an ideal and equal relationship, both woman AND man help each other with house chores and all other aspects of life. It's called partnership and a supportive relationship. It's not a womans job nor purpose in life to cook, clean nor serve you know...
4. I would dear say that yes, other men than Saudis are perfectly able to love their wives. I would not call control, lack of equality and strict opressing gender roles as love... But hey, that's just me :) Different cultures interpret love differently, that's just how it is...

Sorry for sounding a bit harsh, but I'm so darn tired of people who try to defend status quo, gender inequality and actual harmful practices in society (look at the reality) with lame arguments like "other men don't love their wives" or "I can stay beautiful for my husband" or "jealousy"...

Just saying, so that no one just refutes every critic of Saudi practice or society as "liberal", "western" or "non-Muslim" - I am a Muslim woman, religious, even fully covered with niqab and everything and one of my worst nightmares would be to move to Saudi or any other similar country. They are so far from my interpretation of my religion as well as what an ideal society means one can find.

Best wishes =)

Anonymous said...

Laylah, I enjoy reading your blog and have found it beneficial ever since moving to KSA. Thanks for the interesting reads. This post kind of bothered me though... why the need to include "tantalizing" pictures of woman. If it to further the notion of the beautiful maids, I find just mentioning the idea is enough, I don't find it necessary to include pics. Reasoning can be found in Steve's disgusting reply.

Woman need to stop being objectified and one of the ways that we can put a stop to this is by us woman showing them in a more respectful light. What do you think? :)

Layla said...

Saudi woman-I doubt that western women are jealous of you having maids:) We just grew up in a totally different culture where having maids is seen as vain and unnecessary :)

Steve-I have to diagree with you 100% I know many women in Saudi who could easily afford maids but they just don't want one for the above and other reasons. Sure there will be some women who WOULD want to have a live-in maid but cant afford it, but those are minority for sure!Im talking about western women in general.

A.M-thank you for your great comment!
Where do you live?

Anonymous-Yes you've got a point.
The pictures of those women are of a moroccan film actress and a beauty pageant.They have their pictures all over the internet for anyone to find, so I didnt see it as wrong putting them on here if you know what I mean. I guess I just wanted to stress the point and get people to react more :)

Anonymous said...

comment to the saudi woman above,excuse me do you really think our men in the west dont LOVE us just because they dont get us maids??u must be kidding me right??

well heres a newsflash for you--our men LOVE us MORE because they do houseowrk WITH us. does your husband do anything in the house??I bet he doesnt!!

Anonymous said...

Thanx Layla. I´m from Scandinavia ;) And I have become a bit of obsessed with Saudi culture and society lately since many Muslims see Saudi as an "ideal" society, or as "the best Muslim society" even though it is not the ideal or perfect one. Many Muslims here in the west, whow I have spoken to, even desire to move to Saudi and live there... And it just makes me so confused! I mean, I have more chance to have my God-given shari´ rights as a woman here in the west than in Saudi... just my (humble?) opinion :P

Noor said...

I really feel like I have to take up for Saudi women here bc my in laws are all Saudi and I love them very much. MANY Saudis do not have maids and others do. I have never heard of a Moroccan maid or an Arab maid to be honest with you. They get maids from Asia bc its cheaper, they trust them more and many other facts. If a woman is not comfortable with someone why would she have them in her home? Its her choice at the end of the day just like a man may not be comfortable with a driver.

I have no idea what Saudi women you all have saw or known but the Saudis I know or light skin and gorgeous and I know a lot mashAllah. If someone can afford something and chooses to do so why would it offend anyone else?

And why would you think a Moroccan is better in bed than someone else? We actually have one in our family married to a Saudi and shes very nice mashAllah and none of us have a problem with her what so ever.

I just do not know where you got these ideas bc I have never heard any such thing before.

Layla said...

Hi Noor thanks for commenting and standing up for Saudi women.
Its just myths that Saudis in general have of Moroccan women, being good in bed and great cooks etc. Most Saudi men will agree and their women know this which is one of the reasons that makes them so uncomfortable with the whole idea.
For sure many men will deny they think like this of have heard it if its their wife asking ;)

I didnt see anyone saying Saudi women are all dark skinned?There are so many different skin tones of Saudi women, one cannot generalize either way.

The women that went to complain to Shoura council must have been genuinely concerned for a reason, I'm sure people dont go there just for fun.

Looks like your family has good experiences with Moroccan women thats great!

I am guessing many Saudi women dont really know any Moroccan women in person, they just hear this stuff and believe it to be true. Its the fear of the unknown!

Sandy said...

I am familiar with more than one Morrocan second wife situation- though none of them were maids. I think, at the end of the day Saudi women will be uncomfortable with any nationality of maid that is perceived as possible wife material. It is a more than an emotional bias- I think it is legally easier for Saudi men to get permission to marry Arab women. So it is actually a more real threat than a non-Arab maid. And I think that the interest is more likely to go both ways. Most Filipinas for example consider a married man off the market. Not necessarily so with Arab women. Married men are NOT off the market at all.

At the end of the day a second wife is more likely than not going to be Saudi- because that's what's mostly around and easiest. And I don't blame wives with Saudi husbands for being insecure. Their situation IS insecure. If their husband takes another wife- what can they do? Nothing that's what.

muslimah in reverie said...

But surely the maids wouldn't go around the house dressed like the pictures you posted!?! O.K so I may be naive here, but I thought it was a muslim country, so how are film actresses able to be dressed like that?

You have such a valid point about Saudi being such an "extreme" country when it comes to segregation, yet they allow non-relative women to clean their houses! Crazy stuff!

Anonymous said...

to Steve in the pub
you are absolutely wrong about everybody wanting a maid if they can afford one!I would never, ever want some woman living under my roof with my husband and kids.what if she beats my kids when im not home?what if she steal?what if she breaks things on purpose?what if she plots against me?what if she lies?what if she flirts with my husband or sons?I would never even know and she could be doing it behind my back.But for sure she would do something because if I paid her a slavery type salary like saudis do she would feel resentment, bitterness,anger jealousy and what else.Just think about it.Its all just human nature.

Noor what kind of bubble do you live in you sound so naive??dont you know they are dark and black saudis too??all saudi men say moroccans(and tunisian)women are great in bed and they always joke about it.do you think they would tell their wives that joke??why do you think they go there for holiday??for the food?hahaha
oh and why do saudi women REALLY want asian maids?because they think they are ugly.I personally overheard some discussion about this.they also said indians and srilankans are really stupid.talked about them like they were talking about different animal species.disgusting.


Noor said...

Why do you all keep saying they are good in bed? Khalas they are from a country so they are good in bed that just seems a little ignorant, right?

Yes, Saudis are all colors but many are gorgeous as is many women around the world. I think a Saudi would worry about ANY Arab woman coming into her home.

But you all act as if the maids walk around with the family in gowns lol. At my in laws you would never even know they have a maid. She has a section at the back of the house and we clean up and take dishes, etc to her. She does not come out and have contact with the family or visitors. She does not serve us, etc. We do all of that ourselves. Shes never alone with people.

Sari you seem to talk to a lot of men about whos good in bed and whos not! I think any Muslim woman would want to please her husband in fear he could marry another one but I personally do not know alhumdullah thats not a topic I discuss with people especially men.

Yes, a lot do go there for Holiday but its bc we all know that Saudis think Moroccan women are easier then other women. Like I said my husbands uncle went but he married her and brought her home. Shes not into black magic or a mean person. Shes a good girl mashAllah and were all very fond of her.

Actually its not just Moroccans here women worry about its any woman from Africa. I met an Egyptian lady and was told not be friends with her bc they are into black magic and just want to use you bc they think Saudis have money. Okay I am not like that at all I judge people by how they treat me.

DB said...

Interesting topic. I am a bit taken aback by the fact that Saudi's think North African women are involved in black magic. I don't know much about these countries but I seriously doubt all women in these cultures do black magic. Isn't magic traditionally performed by special "priests" in every culture? Not every woman on the street has the knowledge to do that. Where do people get these ideas?
As a westerner who recently had a baby I wish we could afford a maid to help out at home. I think that when you have children it is very hard to do all the housework yourself even if your husband helps. I am nowadays on the go all day until I go to bed. I have had to start leaving some housework chores undone in order to give my baby the attention she needs and not run myself into the ground. I don't see anything wrong with a woman wanting to hire a maid as long as she treats the maid as a human being and not a slave. And as long as the children are not brought up exclusively by the maid. I think there is no shame in it and you are no less an adherent to the Lutheran work ethic (I live in Finland, which is Lutheran country and people are against hired help)if you get some household help. Would I want the maid living with me all day every day? No. But maybe others can deal with that so be it. We women should not judge each other. Mothers and housewives have it hard enough already for us to start telling each other you MUST do all the housework yourself or you are lazy.

Anonymous said...

"Yes, in Morocco, we have maids, but they are most of time blacks because they are originally from Africa."

lol, and where is Morocco located? Antartica?

Anonymous said...

if these saudi women have insecurities its because this is what they have been fed indirectly growing up and after marrage kept on her toes by a sulky imature husband getting easily disgruntled at the smallest thing with the effect he will get what he wants so at the end of the day, even if she starts out as a happy confident young bride, most will end up in their corner in fear of losing her children husband or both.This fear can be realised over night even in what appears to be a happy marriage..these mens heads are so easily turned towards a prety females strangling the blood supply to his brain.The home already has many simmering pressures so why invite one in the front door..women who work and leave a maid at home, beware, she is thinking she is a flat nosed, dark skinned worker, its safe, men are not thinking that !ladies, if you go out to work,,forget leaving the maid at home..invatation to problems

Anonymous said...

re the anon morroccan woman..yes thats what these men want a cook and a...with a mindless manakin..but its usually okay with this kind of women as they have a price $$$$$$$$$$

Anonymous said...

good but stay in the house with her !!

bigstick said...

Did any of you ever think that you are you own worst enemy. Seriously you are putting other women down because men are allowed to go wild without restraint and not for the purposes outlined in your koran. Seriously stop bashing women who have little say and start bashing the men who are doing all of you wrong. The religion outlined is for the purposes of widows and orphans. Not because cute little thing is available.

Anonymous said...

I TOTALLY agree with you Laylah! Most of these women would be just fine without a maid - if they tried! I mean, fair enough if you're old, sick, have a big family and need a helping hand, but alot of these women do not fit that category! And then to turn around and blame other women and blame their husband bla bla bla... you're asking for trouble the moment you let these women in to your home! And yeah, how hypocritical that segregation rules are disregarded in private yet in public, that "religious" image is upheld. If people stopped practicing Islam so backwardly, then they wouldn't be in such a mess.

Danielletrini said...

True one should be able to trust one's husband around other women. If you can't then you should not have married him.

Anonymous said...

It's not only the men who have relationships with these maids, the women also get at her too whether it's a beautiful Asian or African. What else does she have to do...nothing, so some of these Saudi women have more time with these pretty maids when the guy and kids are at work. Hmm, and why not. In this case it is "Equal Opportunity".

treva said...

i stumbled across you blog by accident but as an american living in teh UAE i can relate to it. i remember when this subject came up and i found it absolutley hilarious and a bit sad on so many levels. my sister in law and i actually argued about it me as a western woman saying all the obvious things, why do they need maids? why don't they trust their husbands? and "magic" do i even have to address this issue again? of course she had an answer for everything and each had the same theme, the women in question were somehow evil. the insecurity among arab women is crazy they are their own worst enemies, if one is succesful she must have done something wrong to attain her success, if she is beautiful she must have surgery... it goes on and on

somali lady said...

anonymous men's right to have many wives dose not need to be defended its there right given to them by god no muslim woman can object to that

Layla interesting blog
i am not sudi but i grow up in a house full of maids i like it its nice it gives one more time to do what they want
if my husband could afford it i would love to have a maid and there is no place to be jealous about the maid coz if husband is a practicing muslim and he will not interact with the maid or see her with no hijab

Anonymous said...

Somali Lady! Nobody's saying women gave men the right to marry up to four wives. We all know where that came fro, thank you very much! The point here is that some worm claim that theydon't mind sharing their husbands, but are fighting the Moroccan maids idea because they don't wanna share their man. Get it now?

Anonymous said...

I see that although alot of you have lived in saudia you still dont understand the culture and mentality of people I think I'll have to defend Saudi women in here. Most people in Saudia tend to have big houses and 1 women cannot do all that house work , the average number of children in a saudi house hold is about 6, after a number of child birth a women's body change we all know that and yes men's eyes tend to wonder, a lot of Saudi men have morrocan women as 2nd wives(which I find hypocritical since polygamy is not allowed in Morocco as the majority of women oppose it but their ok with being 2nd wives to Saudi men) , so obviously Saudi women see them as a threat, besides generally Saudi men or I should say arab are not willing to help around the house which puts all the burden on the women and its harder when you're a working women.
Source: Life experience

Anonymous said...

Your funny,thumbs up...

Anonymous said...


I read your post and I have to say that to protect their marriage and family Saudi woman have done the right thing and I hope they succeed in banning Moroccan maids, here are reasons why: I have lived and grown up in Holland where Moroccans are majority minority so I have known enough of them to say that they are taking part in black magic... and from becoming a maid mostly their aim will be to become the second wife (or make daughter/sister the second wife) and then make the husband divorce his first wife. There is little moral modesty amongst majority Moroccans when it comes to marital relation and premarital sex (Fact.. heard discussions from Moroccans).Also Moroccans know Arabic and will be able to communicate better with the MR in the house than any other maid, plus they are able to fit in better looks wise that e.g Asian maids such as Malaysians and Philippians's .
This has happened to my husbands uncle.. the Marroccan wife wants him to divorce his first wife after now after being the second wife for about 12 years and she has managed to bring most of her family to Saudi for work too.
A lot of Marroccan woman are also happy to doing sex working I have heard (not from Moroccans but from holiday goers, Saudi men who have been there for there claim that girls have suggested this to them)

Anonymous said...

To to what I was saying those who intend to take something work a lot harder. For example regardless where the woman is from is she wants to win over a man she will be more pleasant..say happy thoughtful things, give a lot of attention and say what the man wants to hear. Unlike the woman who had an arranged marriage and got to know her man slowly without any experience.

I think this is why some Saudi women feel vulnerable and begin to think that other women are better than them.

Any thoughts?

Anonymous said...

Just stumbled on to this lovely blog and have read it with a lot of pleasure! I am a westerner, married to a Moroccan man for many years and a convert to Islam. I have read the comments on Moroccan women and would like to throw in my two cents worth on the subject! To be honest, the "legend" of Moroccan women and their prowess and beauty is a rumour that has been making the rounds for many years. No one knows how it started but Moroccan women are no more beautiful or skillful at anything than ANY other women. It is only, as posters here stated, a matter of taste, and a lot of exaggerated stories IMHO.

As far as black magic is concerned, I hate to say it but there are some women here who practice "spells" using incantations like the witches from Macbeth, and with as much effectiveness as "eye of newt" tossed in a pot. This is practiced by women usually coming from underprivileged classes who do not have a strong religious background and moreover are uneducated. "Putting a spell" on someone and turning them from their family is usually nothing more than a pretty face and a sparkling personality that makes a guy feel worthy, smart and sexy. This is something that works in any country, in all societies and all social stations: if a guy is made to feel great about himself, it is a very strong lure to hear it repeated! But there is still a persistent idea about the efficacy of magic spells and the "old ways" in this modern country that leads to a handful of women still going in for this.

Most of the Moroccan women going to the KSA come from underprivileged and uneducated backgrounds and see leaving as a way to upward mobility. A sense of survival and desperation MIGHT make them try to be more amenable and eager to please in any job they have, leading to them becoming a second wife or whatever, but who knows the truth? Of course, there are men anywhere who are basically philanderers whether they are from Bombay, Moscow, Rio, or Jeddah, and it is unfortunate when nice families are broken up. But it happens all the time.

I have had maids since arriving in Morocco, and my present one has been with me since 1999. She is more a member of the family than anything else, but why does it work? We have always maintained a respectful distance -- we respect her and she respects us and it works perfectly, and this makes a perfect working arrangement.

At the end of the day, Moroccan women are like women anyplace else. If a couple have a strong marriage, no amount of eye batting, lasciviousness or anything else from the help will shake it. After all, this is a business arrangement: a maid or cook or driver is an employee who is paid for a service. And if the employee is not respectful of the employer, then they unfortunately have to leave!

Anonymous said...

Thanks for an interesting blog, Leylah, but you got to be kidding! The attitude of the saudi women in this particular topic must be one of the most racist and judgemental things I have ever come across in my life! They clearly regard the moroccans as worthy equals (even if they are maids) while the other nationalities are not even worth to be given the time of day and thus are not a threat to the very valuable husband..

Anonymous said...

God help us all

Anonymous said...

For some reason Saudi ladies (in this particular blog) thinks we Western women are jealous. Sorry to burst your bubble, but we are NOT. I am a Westerner and married to a tribal man from the Gulf. I got two maids, but they don't raise my kids. I also do my own chores and all they do is help me. I do not rely on them to do ALL the work for me.

It is complete bull$hit (sorry for my rudeness) to say that Western men cannot love. We are ALL humans and we are capable to love. Again, Allah will not be asking you for your passport on the day of Judgement, so if you had a Saudi passport and heritage in life, does not mean you are getting into heaven (yes, I am also a Muslim).

Beautiful women are everywhere and if you can't trust your husband, you should not be married to him. Trust is an important part of marriage.

Anonymous said...

I don't see the need to judge other women's choices, particularly when Saudi women seem to have relatively few options to make choices. If women want to have household help and can afford it why are we judging them? Why should we accept that because many Saudi women are often confined to the home against their wishes, they should also unquestioningly do all the household chores? I know if I was forbidden to work, had limited transportation and few recreational options open to to me, I would be furious at also having to cook and clean all day.

From what I understand from Saudis I've spoken to, and people who have lived in Saudi Arabia (including my father in law) there are a lot of reasons Saudi families have maids. For one, Saudis tend to have large families and even if they don't have tons of kids their extended family will often drop by and you end up feeding and cleaning up after large groups of people regularly, apparently there is more dirt and dust than in most western countries and therefore there is more daily cleaning, the men do not help with the housework or childcare AT ALL which leaves it entirely to the women.

Yes, some people are lazy and selfish, and yes some people neglect their children and rely too much on domestic help, but let's not condemn all Saudi women for having maids. That's just silly. As women we should support one another's choices and ability to make them even if they're things you wouldn't necessarily choose for yourself.

Anonymous said...

I would not judge the ladies who have maids. There is nothing wrong with hiring help as long as the maids are not raising the kids. Help with cleaning, cooking, etc... is completely OK. I have maids myself (I am a Westerner), however, I don't think claims that we are jealous of Saudi ladies or Western men can't love are valid.

Also, they should not blame maids for the bad behavior of their husbands. If one cannot trust their husband, marriage will be a problem.

Are all Saudi women are like that (throwing their kids to the maid)? Of course not. Saudi is a big country, not everyone is the same.

Anonymous said...

A quick google image search on "moroccan maid saudi" produced these two images side by side: http://i.imgur.com/M6QHlcY.jpg

Anonymous said...

"That opens up another discussion, why are these foreign women allowed to live with unrelated males in the first place? Is Saudi-Arabia not based on gender segregation?"

Oh, that's easy to answer. You see, there are two sets of Islamic rules in the gulf. One fore gulf Arabs, and another for everyone else.

Anonymous said...

I agree with what you said 150%. And the quote from the Quran sums it up nicely.