Sunday, March 11, 2012

Blog Hate Mail: The Hall Of Shame

Every once in a full moon I get hate mail or just hateful comments on the blog. I guess it's normal. Haters gonna hate.


Naturally there will be people who will disagree on what I write or how I view things. But some of those are just negative envious haters that thrive on trashing others. Putting others down makes them feel better about themselves. Negative people also cannot stand positive people. I bet I get on their nerves! Others are just ignorant and rude by nature and nothing can be done to change that.

Predominantly these comments have come from Saudis, some women who pretended to be my friends from the hospital I worked in, and unfortunately Muslim women suffering from the Holier than thou- personality disorder.

Usually I just delete these comments or don't bother to respond because if a person has made up their mind then there's nothing much I can do or even care to do. I see it as a waste of time to get into an argument with these type of people. Everything I would say to such a close-minded person would just backfire. So I usually just leave them to their sorry existence.

I have however saved the "best" comments in my comments box. These actually had me cracking up because of their absurdity, incomprehensibility or just plain humor factor. It is time to open the can of worms! I will expose these comments now and let you laugh at them too because honestly, that's the only thing these people deserve. Here is the Blue Abaya Hall of Shame!

One of the first comments I saved was this one:
"You're offensive to all women because you are so ignorant. Your giving finnish people, blonde women, and all expat nurses a bad name. Clearly you lost your grip on reality a long time ago. Go work somewhere else so you won't take **** down with you. Signed, Normal and Sane Expat Nurses."

So this is what "normal, sane" nurses think? Wow. Kinda scary actually. My mother is a psychiatrist and she tells me how shocking it is that the largest group of psychiatric patients that come for treatment are actually nurses. The above comment is a prime example of people in dire need of help!

The saddest thing about this comment is that it's obviously coming from a person/persons (or maybe person with multiple personalities??) who knows me. Perhaps even a so called friend also known as a back stabber. I knew many friends women that all turned their backs on me after I converted and met my husband. And when my back was turned the knives were thrown! Some even continue their hatred to this day.

This is a prime example of jealousy among women, the ignorance and prejudice some expats have of their host country, and the hatred toward Saudis and Islam some feel.The mention of "loosing grip on reality" is direct referral to my conversion. When a western woman converts to Islam most other westerners here will start calling them crazy or delusional.

Oh and I had to censor the name of the hospital to prevent people from thinking it's a looney bin because of this comment!

Btw I wonder how exactly I am tarnishing the name of blonde women in particular since I thought blondes are considered dumb, slow and "easy"? So what's there to tarnish LOL


Ok. So how about this classic:
"Laylah: if you don't like Saudi Arabia, just leave the country ; Or you trying to prove that you are real hypocrite ? Why you live if you don't agree with the 1) Laws of the country 2) Regulations of the country 3) Legislations of the country You say you are finnish, and we know how clean the finnish people are ?! I am sure the mutawwas didn't teach you or your husband that in Saudi Arabia after relieving one has to use water or you go to Jail for being dirty, filthy or unhygienic ( b*** crust people )"


What can I even begin to say to this anal person? Hey news flash I do like the country (unlike many expats here!) but there just isn't a country in the world that doesn't have its problems. Saudi has many issues and I write about them honestly and to the point. Sorry if you can't handle the criticism of your perfect country Mr. Clean Butt. Btw laws, regulations and rules are actually the same thing.


Oh, and no thank you to the muttawa coming to teach me how to wipe my a*****e. I'm sure you enjoyed it very much though. I did not know this was included in their services so thanks for the info anyways.


The next hate comment I saved was posted as a reply to a comment "Saudi Princess" left on the article "Tourism in Saudi-Arabia Faces Many Obstacles". The Princess wrote how she thought allowing tourists into Saudi would contaminate her country, how brothels would start popping up and alcohol would be served everywhere(as if the Saudis are not already doing a pretty good job on all of those). Check the full post and comments here: http://blueabaya.blogspot.com/2011/09/tourism-in-saudi-arabia-faces-many.html

This is the reply of Hijabi:
"With all respect, but I agree with Saudi Princess. I dont know whether you are a convert to Islam or not, but to me you just cause a lot of fitna with this blog. Alot of negativity and anger towards the saudi way of life on this blog. So sad.. Also...your liberal, progressive Islam bothers me. Because there is no liberal Islam.. Your post about polygamy really shocked me! you speak with so much arrogance about how polygamy is not necessary and how it should disappear beceause your nafs is not able to handle some parts within Islam.. Always keep in mind that all these words that u write will be held against you on the Day of Judgement. Your blog and your view on certain parts of Islam is exactly the reason why western people shouldnt come to saudi! They try to change Saudi into something more western! As read on your blog, western people and even some locals dont appreciate al mutawa but to be honest, they cant appreciate it because they want to be free, and go agains the rules and dresscodes within Islam. So happy the borders are so strict and I hope they make them even more stricter!"

Oh goodness. Can someone please pass the screwdriver?

I'm pretty fed up of hearing this type of BS coming from muslim women. Did she even read the article? How can someone think the article is negative in any way? Only a person wallowing in negativity would.

My liberal, progressive Islam that bothers her. You know what? God gave me a brain so I could think for myself. That's actually how I found Islam, by questioning, reasoning, reading and realizing. It's not my problem if you can't handle the FACT that Muslims will always have different opinions on things. Not all muslims are brainwashed into thinking and following blindly.

Not everyone is going to agree with you Ms."I write a make-up and false eyelashes blog but I like to judge other muslim women for having liberal views"-Hijabi. I don't really care what your views are either way it's what conclusions you came to and it's fine by me . But don't come here to judge me and feel sorry for me and then in the next sentence say I am arrogant. Look whose talking.

Don't even get me started on muttawa and freedom. Those two words do not even belong in the same sentence! Most Saudis will agree.

Then check out what the Holiest of All wrote:
 You are extremely rude...and arrogant..you should read what you wrote. Extremely condescending. I don't know who you think you are..oh yes...a white "princess" married to a rich Saudi..so what...get a grip..you seem to have the typical snotty manners of a European...even when they convert they lack manners...subhanallah...go pray 2 rakaahs asking for forgiveness for being so ignorant, horrid and absolutely snotty. If you are so busy and get a gazillion comments then hey...don't blog..not that you have anything interesting to read..I just wanted to know where I could purchase this abaya and you didn't even have that information....whatever...inshallah I hope you learn proper muslim manners...but it seems you've learned SAUDI manners...I pray Allah gives you hidaya and you should go read the Hadith Qudsi...Arrogance belongs to Allah not women such as yourself..."


Manners, manners, manners..Sigh. This was the reply I decided not to post because of its personal offense that goes against comments policy (read our conversation and the post here http://blueabaya.blogspot.com/2010/05/blue-harbour-exhibition-in-riyadh.html and you be the judge if what she said is true or was I in fact trying to answer her weird question ) Here it is now in all it's hate and glory. 
What a brilliant example she gives of "proper muslim manners" huh? 
Some recommended reading.


I'm going to skip all the miserable nonsense in the beginning and just comment on the "gazillion comments -don't blog"-equation. I find this conclusion very interesting. So a blogger that has lots of comments should stop blogging? Struggling to find time to reply means I shouldn't even bother writing my uninteresting posts? Hmm...


Arrogance belongs to Allah?? Where did that come from!
I wonder what she has against Europeans? Actually, I really don't care. 


And then finally this comment which just made my day:
"Laylah, I think one of these days you'll get reported to saudi authorities and your HATE BLOG will be shut down. I think you are crossing the RED line here. I have been through your HATE BLOG and its FULL of HATRED against saudi people, saudi culture and traditions. If you don't like it here, LEAVE! My comment is not about 'staring' but rather your HATE BLOG in general."


Ladies and gentleman I think we have a winner here! Mrs. HATE posted this comment on the "Letter to Saudi Women Please Leave My Husband Alone"-post. Like I mentioned in the beginning of that post (which can be read here http://blueabaya.blogspot.com/2010/09/plea-to-saudi-women-please-leave-my.html) it was highly unlikely the letter would ever reach any of these women in question. 

It took over a year but finally BINGO! Even though she tries to convince us she is not commenting on the staring aka bad manners, but reading between the lines here and just the "subtle" tone of her comment..I think this post hit a sore spot. Ouch!

FYI I'm not going to leave Saudi. I like it here and have a good life. My husband is one of those one in a million men out there (which I doubt you wouldn't know of), I have a beautiful happy daughter, wonderful friends, we travel a lot around this amazing country and we just moved to a dream apartment in DQ..So sorry to disappoint you dear.

If anyone is ever going to report this blog it would be such a person as you and you most likely already did it because..
Phew. I feel like I have taken out the garbage now! What a stinky pile of crap there was lying around in the comments box.

Thank God I get so much more grateful and positive feedback from all over the world which keeps me going. I will leave you with an email comment I recently received from a new fan of Blue Abaya:

"Really an interesting initiative to discuss Saudi culture and its implications in a respectful manner as done by you. I appreciate your use of proper language in discussing issues in which you tend to differ with the local people.

If only, every culture around the world had a Laylah."

Have a nice day everyone!


121 comments:

New Wife said...

omg... lol thats a lot of negativity...

well even if I don't always agree with what you say, i appreciate your opinion and your experience. and i never felt that you were being rude or anything.

Layla said...

New Wife-thank you that was very sweet of you :)

D said...

Go Laylah! The pics you used in this post made me laugh so much lol!

For the record though mashaAllah your blog is interesting and insightful, I for one really appreciate you sharing your unique and positive perspective on all things KSA, it's been a great help to me in coming to terms with moving there myself as a wife of a Saudi inshaAllah. One of the few blogs out there that encouraged me to see it as being more an adventure than a death sentence!

Standy said...

Well said..

loved how you wrote this post..

Anonymous said...

Laylah, just wanted to say that I adore your blog and check in a couple times each week to see if you've posted anything new. When I first stumbled upon it I was absolutely delighted because although I'm America, my Dad's family is from Suomi. And I'm in grad school studying the Middle East and Arabic. You offer unique observations and help demystify Saudi. I even cited your blog for my undergraduate thesis about modernity in Saudi Arabia. Keep it up and let the haters hate!

Lina said...

Wow..I can't imagine how it must feel to have to read this..so sorry you have to deal with such idiots!
I have so many issues with these comments!
Ok so the back stabbers: to me it looks this person is the one responsible for giving the hospital the bad rep!All your posts are so interesting and mind opening on top well writen and the pics are wonderful! How could anybody say that other then from pure envy?you know what?people like this just want to be like you or then want something you have!maybe the talent is lacking lol

for the comment to the second one I can only say lol

then this princees ans hijabi, don't listen to them! closeminds never open!how dare she come to tell you what is religion and what is not!

for woman asking for that abya I would say SHAME on them for talking to you like that and saying you're the one with no manners! i read the discussion you said nothing near to what she describes.You tried to help her!thise people make non muslims run away from islam for sure!to me she sounds appalling!almost evil.

your blog is the most interesting saudi blog I know and I always read it.I dont think its negative for Saudi!the haters goin to hate like the last one comment is the example of a real HATER looooool

please continue this wonderful blog and keep being who you are and congratulation for the new house!could you show us pictures?

راوية said...

Wow! Reading those comments was really shocking to me. I cannot imagine how you felt when you read them. I myself sometimes do not agree with some of the posts, but I do respect them because I know that the main purpose behind the post is improvement and changing to the better. But I mostly enjoy how you notice things about Saudi life and culture that we grew with but never notice ourselves.
You seem like a strong person so I am sure that those haters won't affect you. In fact, I actually think that their attacks are indications of your success.

Lavender © said...

Interesting stuff! I am still trying to find the anti Saudi sentiment your blog has to offer :P People don't get it... to love any country... is to want what is best for it. Wanting positive change is NOT unpatriotic.. it is in fact the most Patriotic one can be! We want this country to be the best of the best... to show the difference between Islam and Culture! To make it a country where our children will be proud to be from! Anyhoo... everyone has their opinions.. and I guess no one can put a gun to anyone's head and force them to read your blog :D

Lavender © said...

Very well said!

Nikki said...

Even when you know a commenter is totally delusional it's still hard to hear/read. Sorry you had to deal with all that! I have to say I was surprised by some of the comments by Saudi women defending the religious police and other aspects of Saudi culture that are not Islamically mandated (but the government tries to pass them off as such). I have many Saudi (women) friends here in America, some of them having been here for less than a year some of them having been here for 5 years or so and they ALL seem to see the hypocritical nature of the Saudi government and the difference between Islamic rules/guidelines and Saudi control issues.

Nikki said...

And that comment about bathroom hygiene and religious police was just too much!?! WTH!?!?!?!?

Shireen Baig said...

Like the first comment, i agree with most of the things you write about.
the one about praying 2 raka was killer, if only she read the way she composed that comment she herself would be compelled to pray 2rakas :P

I think people just have issues in accepting that their country like everyone else's has some areas where it could be improvised. I generally enjoy the educating issues that you raise here and honestly people always talk about 'change' but nobody does anything about, atleast you write about it. So, kudos and keep writing :)

Anonymous said...

Hi Layla.. I must say that I love, LOVE reading your blog.. I believe that people/expats usually form an unjust opinion of a country and its people without really knowing whats going on or what its like. you're blog gives us readers some insight regarding the people and the culture of saudi arabia.
And with regard to the "haters" never mind them.. what are doing reading your blog anyway.. if they hate it so much, why not just read something else.. and then they still use their "precious time" to fill your message board with hate speech.. lol
poor people have nothing better to do..

Ramadan Dinners said...

Fantastic post and very well said! Keep up with the blog!

kristin said...

holy cow, laylah-- there are some nutters out there. i've lived here in saudi for 6 months (american expat) and i'm gonna be honest-- it's HARD. your blog not only has given me new insight into saudi customs and culture but also has encouraged me to see saudi (and saudis) in a more positive light. thanks for writing, please don't stop! oh and another blog i used to read is Under the Abaya-- not sure if you know the author personally but I hope she is doing ok. cheers!

Lavender © said...

Oh.. and I for one would think the Saudi Tourism Authority.. or whatever official name they go by.. should PAY you for all the great things you post about Saudi Arabia... I can assure you that 95% of Saudi's have NOT gone to all the places in this beautiful country that you have. Your pictures are always so beautiful.. catching the perfect moment. Truly allowing your readers.. those of us here.. and abroad to live these travels of yours with you! So Keep it up.. and ignore the haters!

Layla said...

Om Lujain-Thank you hon :)That really means a lot to me! LOL I wish someone would pay me for this! Because this seriously takes so much of my time it's like a job :)

Anonymous said...

You are doing a great job in your blog. Those nasty comments are from people who are ignorants. People like them are the culprit for lots of the what is wrong with Saudi Arabia and why it cannot move forward. So sad.

Layla said...

Kristin-thanks for the encouraging comment! I'm so glad to hear from ppl like you. This is definitely one of the reasons I blog, so I can help expats (and why not locals?) find things to do here and to shed a more positive light on the Kingdom!
I know her and she made her blog private because of hate mail :/ She's doing fine and you can ask to read her blog by sending her request!

Layla said...

Little Miss Nobody-Thank you! You're right about the expats forming certain opinions..Often this is due to the fact that they don't leave their own circles much and tend to avoid all things Saudi, let alone get to know/talk to Saudis which is a great shame because they are really missing out!
I'm waiting for one of them to comment on this post ;)

Hope said...

Layla, I am shocked at the hate comments! u know whats funny, your blog has really helped me cope with living in Saudi Arabia. When I first moved here from the states, I was really miserable and i was surrounded by a lot of negative energy from all around. But when I started to read about your experiences, I thought they were hilarious and you really made me see the beauty of Saudi Arabia. You made me appreciate the souks, the desert, the good food, etc. and with all the other negative things, i started looking at them with a different light, by looking at the humor of them. You also inspired me to take out my camera and take pics of funny events that would only Happen in Riyadh!
Your blogs were the best thing that happened to me.!! I really think that u will be rewarded good by Allah. ALso the blog about Polygamy was ingenious!!

-Hope ;-)

Minä said...

Omg, really? I just love the way you say things. Keep going!! Dont let those people take you down woman! :)

Sabah said...

These comments sound like written by lunatics - contradictory incoherence. I love your blog and the way you write about Saudi make it seem so much more human-friendly (tongue-in-cheek here, people), LOL. I guess it's mainly jealousy talking (although some sound almost chemically induced).

Farooq said...

Keep it going Laylah, you are doing a good job. Don't let the negative comments get to you.

I will always make it a point to visit your blog everyday. I wish I could subscribe to it. Not sure how though.

Anonymous said...

Fantastic blog. I feel that you have been fair with your thoughts and views on Saudi. Sometime it is hard for people to accept alternative views and can even be interpreted very negatively. Please keep the wonderful blogs flowing. I felt that I have gotten to like Saudi a little more after looking at your wonderful pictures and travel-blogs around this magical kingdom.

Singapore Expat in KSA.

saudi_children_left_behind said...

Laylah, Your attitude puts a smile on my face :) I have enjoyed your blog for a while now and I love it. People are always going to hate and "taking out the garbage" AWESOME!!! BIG HUGS!!!

Anonymous said...

lol! these comments were epic! I can't believe there is people like that! and my first thought is that maybe they all are muslim women if not saudi women! maybe they got mad at your super funny post on khaleeji style make up (that is totally true btw, i'm saying this cause not long ago i made fun of the way they painted (literally) their faces, and an arab lay got super mad at me. Anyways, as you said, haters gonna hate...

Latin Muslimah

Anonymous said...

Hi Laylah! I just wanted to say I love your blog and keep it going. I check it almost everyday because I find your point of view so right on spot. I was a convert, so I like to hear about others experience in Muslim countries, even if I don't believe what you believe : ) Good day, Love , Miss T.

Layla said...

D-thanks! Glad to have helped you and it's certainly not a death sentence lol! Unless you want to take it as such ;)

Layla said...

Standy-thank you!

Layla said...

^^Thanks for the positive feedback!How cool you're half Finnish! puhutko suomea?
Wow I've been quoted on your thesis, super cool :)

Layla said...

Lina-I will be honest and say it was NOT as easy as I may have made it sound in this post :/
I wallowed for a while with some but then got over it. Now I'm sort of just numb to them!
That's exactly why I censored the hospital name! Didn't want these people to give it a looney bin name.
Thanks for the comment and understanding..maybe when we've moved in I could post some pics!

Layla said...

ربة منزل- it didn't feel good is all I can say!
Thanks for the feedback and you're spot on as to my intentions :)

I like your thinking "their attacks are indication of your success" :)

Layla said...

Om Lujain-Could not have it better myself! i wonder what made them "go through everything" if they hated it so much? Hate can be a motivator I guess! Like I said they THRIVE on it!!

Layla said...

Nikki-Thanks hon :) I'm also surprised every time I hear of a woman who defends oppression. That is the ultimate example of successful brainwashing for you!

Layla said...

Shireen BAig-LOL but you think even if she read it, would make any difference> Seems like the type of person who doesn't take any advice from others yet is always right in her own opinions and loves to shove it down others throats!
Thanks I will :)

Layla said...

anon-Well said! These people are the source of ignorance!

Layla said...

Hope- thank you so much!! I really appreciate your feedback :)))
Yes what else can we do but take it all with humor (although sometimes it seems impossible). i'm so glad to hear how your outlook changed, really means a lot to me :)

Layla said...

Minä- Yes really LOL
I won't ;)

Layla said...

Sabah-Lunatics? You said it, not me :p LMAO at the chemically induced!thanks for the comment :)

Layla said...

Farooq-Thanks for your comments on the blog, very much appreciated!I think if you scroll all the way down and enter your email in there it should make you subscribed, no? Sorry I'm pretty clueless on these things!

Layla said...

Singapore expat-Happy to hear that my blogs made you like the magic kingdom a bit more :)thanks for the comment!!

Layla said...

Saudi-children-left-behind
Hugs back to you and thank you :)

Layla said...

Latin Muslimah-Epic indeed! The first comment is 100% sure form a non-muslim hater/back stabber, second and fourth might be Saudi women..The last one definitely got upset from something I said that hit too close to home, maybe the make-up who knows!!

The third comment was not a Saudi I checked her blog which btw has now been deleted!!!

Layla said...

Miss T-thanks for your comment very much appreciated!

Dentographer said...

eeek…and i thought your blog is all nifty and representative…appearntly there is alot of house keeping being done behind the screen!!

its sad…that so many of these negative comments are trying to represent islam.
keep up the good work Om Lamia.

Anonymous said...

Dear Laylah
This is my first comment here.
I love your blog, please never let anyone stop you!! It is difficult and it has never been easy doing the right thing.
Let me give you my example, my husband is arab and I am an asian, we met when we studied in the America, every time when I go out with my sons, people only think I am the maid, here they call me " Hey", And I always think maybe I should wear like Ninja in order to blend in. My husband always get very angry if this happens, but myself I know who I am. So it never bothers me. People talk anyway, it doesn't really matter you are covered or naked, you are black or white. Cheer up. I love you!!

BigMama.

Anonymous said...

Dear Laylah,

Shocking hateful comments. So sorry to hear that they have done this to you but I like it that it did not dampen your spirits. You go girl! You right though about jealousy, I think that is the main reason for the hateful comments. I have been reading your blog since early 2011, and I love to read about your travelog-kind of posts. I keep coming back to check for new posts every week. Keep up the good work Laylah. And the monkey manners's book reccomendation is fitting. Haha.

Sireh

Unknown said...

I receive similar comments a lot and never bother doing anything. Most comments are by email though, since my blog has unmoderated commenting. I found that if someone is coward enough to email me a comment, then he/she doesn't deserve my time for a reply. But I like your idea, hmm, do you mind if I steal it one day and make my one Hall of Shame? :P

Keep blogging and forget those haters, I like how similar the comments are in GCC nationals (Ok before anyone says anything, I am a GCC national and a Khaleeji, but some comments just reflect how ignorant SOME GCC citizens are. There are bigger problems in the world than telling people to go to their own country. Oh, and, grow up people, there is no perfect country, and positive criticism is done by people who care not the ones who don't.)

sorry for the long reply, I got frustrated reading some comments too, brought back lots of memories.

Anonymous said...

Dear Laylah, I agree with the supportive comments written above. There are many interesting blogs from KSA based bloggers but yours is the only one I follow and always read.

When I get some not nice comments I just think about celebrities who achieved a lot but still have some people criticizing and hating them. This is life, people are different and we can't be loved by everybody. Yes, some people dislike me (my actions, my ideas, my clothes, or my blog) for whatever reason, but so do I dislike some other people and things - normal.

Affinity for Modesty said...

Hi Laylah, how are you and Lamia? That is her name right? (I saw Dentographer mentioned it. I think it is a beautiful friend, its very popular among my Eastern European friends. Dear God, how awful to see such comments being thrown at you. I know those people mean nothing to you but sometimes it still hurts to find people hating you so much, I could relate to that. Your blog is one of my top reads and I would view it a few times a day. I wish you would write everyday hehehe because you have a quirky yet amazing insight to most things in life. Btw, did you have to edit any comments on THIS topic hehehe? I believe there would be some of those haters who would want to hurl you some more hate, especially since their actions have been brought to light :) but you know what, you have more fans than haters, I can see that here.

Lots of hugs,

Umm Gamar

Affinity for Modesty said...

oops i mean i think it is a beautiful NAME...not friend.

Anonymous said...

Laylah, thank you for exposing the negative comments on your blog. The authors are hateful, ignorant people and please forgive them for being that way. They are unhappy in their lives. You are a strong woman and although I've only been following your blog for a couple of weeks, I can attest to your kindheartedness. As Umm Gamar said; I think you have more fans than haters here!!! Keep blogging! Francesca from Ottawa, Canada

Anonymous said...

Blogisi on mielenkiintoinen ja realistisen oloinen seka mielenkiintoisia aiheita kasitteleva. Kiitokset siita!

Anonymous said...

I wondered how you could tell where these comments originated. Are you getting any of these toxic comments in response to this particular blog post?

This reminds me of your blog on the perverts at the Princess Souk. Putting their pictures on line is similar to posting these poisonous comments. It cleanses like putting something rotten out in the sun.

Annie

Karen King said...

Sweetheart, you know that those who love you, do so with a passion. They far outweigh the haters, of that I'm sure. You've just proven that a RoS runs through humanity and not just in front of apartment buildings. The trick is to pick up your abaya as you walk over those rivers... Love to you from Fitchburg, the Finnish capital of Massachusetts. SISU!

Satu VW said...

Phewww... I'm happy you've just laughed these haters off! Your blog is super interesting and gives a good view of the society you live in, and not in a negative way I think. Keep on writing! :)

Sandra-DXB said...

Laylah, keep up the good work on this blog, I actually find it give a honest and refreshing view of KSA...which is not alway easy to come by. Well, at least those haters gave us a good laugh!! :p

S.B said...

That is actually exactly what I felt as well (regarding New Wife's comment). I don't always agree with every little thing you say (who would with anyone?) but I appreciate you sharing your views and experiences with all of us. Haters gonna be haters, I've had my share of hate-comments as well (someone once said I was "ruined within" LOL)...

erin S lee said...

Laylah, I think you are lovely. We have the G-d given right to question things we do not understand, show our emotions on things we like and dislike and to give our opinions when we see fit. I am not Muslim but I would think the core of any religion is the love of G-d and of the human race. Do not be bothered by the ridiculousness, keep doing what you re doing, you are appreciated even in Los Angeles, CA.

bigstick1 said...

Hi Laylah:

I was expecting some really bad #$$##$%6@!!@. These are not too bad for the most part just insulting. I actually think AL's statements to you on AB's website was far more insulting to you; which he had absolutely no justification for stating.

By the way he got himself kicked off after some stuff he went on about with me. I actually had fun with the insults but AB nor Sandy cared for his rhetoric. I was very nice to him though even with his one insult to me after another after another after another. AB threw him into moderation. Haven't heard from him since.

You don't have to publish them one if you don't want to.

bigstick1 said...

Hey by the way I think the cat picture is great.

Diana said...

Laylah, dont get discouraged by stupid, negative comments. I think you are doing a great service to people like me that don´t have any contact with Muslims except through the news. Its very interesting to see how you live, how you deal with restrictions and overall has left me with a very positive impression. Has even made me want to visit Saudi or the Middle East.

Desert Housewife A. (The Canadian in Jubail) said...

Ahhhhh I just lost my comment but to make it short I LOVE UR BLOG <3

Anonymous said...

Looks like you and your so call "haters" have something in commoned. You're all opinionated. You back what you put out. Maybe you can try another angle, like blogging about the most positive things in Saudi Arabia while acknowledging the negative. Think to benefit yourself, your readers and the Saudi citizens who get offended when you speak I'll of their home.

You're a visitor, a guest. Imagine you invite someone into your home and they write about the negative things they see in it.

Youre behavior is not from the good manners of a Muslim.

May Allaah guide you to that which is correct, ameen.

UmmArbaa

Hope said...

She's not a guest, She's is a resident in Saudi Arabia. She's a mother of a Saudi girl and a wife to a saudi man and she happens to be a writer who exposes the TRUTH! Anyway,,Layla talks a lot of good things about Saudi, she also points out some of the fasad and the negative things about saudi but its all positive criticism.. U can't think that u live in an ideal world where u get hurt if someone points out the truth! Staying quiet about corruption is the lowest of Iman. Our religion tells us to speak out and try to make a change in possible. Before you make a judgement about Layla's blog, read it first! you will realize how she actually beautified your country and how she's very balanced in her opinions.

Desert Housewife A. (The Canadian in Jubail) said...

UmmArbaa did u even read the Blog? Anyways last time I heard, the wife and mother of Saudi citizens aren't just "visitors" or "guests" but if that's how you view foreign women... I pray that ALLAH answers your own du3a2 3la nafsich AMEEN

Karen King said...

UmmArbaa, the way Blue portrays a practicing Muslim woman gives me hope that someday the Kingdom will raise itself up out of man-made laws and fatwas and embrace the true meaning of Islam. I am currently reading the Quran, and there not much of Saudi society reflected in those teachings. Your society reflects some of the most anti-female traditions I've ever encountered in a people, and according to your religion, that type of behaviour is neither sanctioned by the Quran nor rewarded by Allah (swt). It's all tradition and a MAN-made tradition. Show respect to all woman in honour of your mother, who struggled to give you life. Without that woman, you'd be nothing. I pray that Allah (swt) removes the clay from your eyes so you can see the truth, and the clay in your ears so that you can hear the truth. Otherwise, according to your own holy book, you run the risk of losing paradise.

Karen King said...

BTW, UmmArbaa, which aspects of Saudi life did you want see portrayed? The fact that it's the only country on Earth where women are forbidden to drive? Or that you behead people for being witches? Curious minds...

Anonymous said...

Salam..
Theres a saying..make your haters your motivators.
In a way it has meaning even if you did nothing to deserve the hate, at least you will be motivated to never treat another human being as they have treated you.
You mentioned a few weeks back you where going to write a post about a saudi wedding you were going to be attending and Ive been hanging out for it since. Is it be on the way??? pretty please :)..lol
#MORENA

So You Want to Go to Saudi Arabia said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
So You Want to Go to Saudi Arabia said...

Dear Layla,

I love your Blogs,and I hope you continue to Keep writing!

Anonymous said...

Dear All Indignant Muslim Women,
You have no idea how much fun your sons, nephews and grandsons are having while studying abroad. And how much is has nothing to do with Islamic rules. Not to mention KSA law.
Just saying.
Peace.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for writing this amazing blog! I enjoy reading about versatile subjects you write about, and the language is great (nokkelaa, rikasta, ilo lukea!!). Love it. Greetings from Tampere!
-Manda

Shannon said...

My fav was the "if you don't like it, go home" as it to say they agree with all legislation in their country. Who the heck agrees with their government on all basis? Oh yeah, I forgot: Saudi's. They are sheep. I work with Saudi's and appreciate so many things, but can't understand their pack/tribe mentality. Forgot that they are a heavily subsidized culture. Perhaps they are "paid" to agree. Way to go Layla... keep speaking for change. Change is needed in ALL countries.

Shannon said...

Also like the comment about you being a visitor Layla... Clearly the writer doesn't read your posts on the beauty of this country.

We don't "own" the land, we are merely born onto it and are blessed to enjoy it. In Canada we embrace diversity. Saudi's do especially when it comes to hired help. Do they really want ethnic minorities to become citizens.

And for the post re: Saudi male students in the USA, Canada, England and Australia.... yes they are running wild. I have worked with them for 6 years.

They are not a strong testimony to the faith they proclaim. How anyone would want to follow them, is beyond me. They are not hard working, don't pay their bills (phone, housing, medical). It is really a disgrace to witness this behavior. They enjoy the benefits of a free education (welfare) and leave with unpaid bills, taxing our system. It's unfortunate that their reputation is getting worse when, on an individual level, they know better. However they don't do better. Sorry for my rant. Layla keep safe and keep blogging. Love you.

Louise said...

Why would someone be upset with you Layla for not agreeing with all legislation!!! Who does? I don't agree with my munical or federal government. I'm a free thinker and clearly so are you.

Is she implying that you should follow like a sheep> I know Saudi's are heavily subsidized and pay little tax, but come on, let's try to be objective and not follow everything our goverment tries to impose on us.

People need to think outside the cultural box.

JoHanna said...

Hei Laylah - fellow expat,
I've been a reader for a while now and every time I come to your blog it amazes me. Your stories are interesting yet different compared to many other blogs, and at the same time your writings are honest, but Oh, for Pete's Sake, you do your best trying to be fair. Afterall we Finns know a little bit about honesty, or at least we are supposed to. I don't think many readers can get this.

I know it's hard to get accustomed to a new country and their traditions and cultural settings. I've been thru that too. But you coming from Finland to KSA. I don't think I could have done that. Too many restrictions, but yet you seem to look at the glass half full!
Keep on writing! I hope your blog will stay open, but be safe (I don't know why I have this fear for you, my imagination takes me to places... sigh!) Terkkuja Texasista!
Take care,
JoHanna

Anonymous said...

Actually, I personally know of a couple of Muslim families who DID NOT want to send their sons abroad just because of this reason(they were aware of the risk)...

Layla said...

Dentographer-Yes there is some sweeping and dirty laundry to be done in the background ;)Thanks!

Layla said...

BigMama-thanks for posting your first comment so nice to hear from you!
I'm glad you haven't been too badly affected by those nasty comments and supremist attitudes! You go girl!!!

Layla said...

Sireh-Always a pleasure to hear from you, thanks for the comment and positive words :)

Layla said...

Faisal Haji-I don't mind at all go ahead and expose the shame lol!I'm surprised you would get such comments too because you're an Emarati so I thought that would give you more "credit" you know what I mean? For me it's always easy for the Saudis to come here and say hey you don't know what you're talking about and if you don't like it go home! But for you, what can they say?
So I'm curious to see if you decide to post those comments then pls do let me know :)

Layla said...

Alice-thank you so much dear I'm so happy to hear that!

One such celebrity I personally admire is Angelina Jolie, she has many haters, but so many more fans! And look at all the things she has achieved in her short life. She does so much good in this world! I love her :)

Layla said...

mrsbawazir-or should I say Umm Gamar! We are fine, just EXTREMELY busy now with renovating and cleaning up the new apt and then we have to start moving soon..

I wish I could have time to write everyday, but even if I tried, then I think the quality of the posts would suffer..They would definitely be shorter and I would not have time to research some stuff before posting which I often like to do. Also I think I might bore ppl to death at some point!

I'm actually waiting with curiosity if these or other haters would come and share us some of their special kind of loving! But disappointingly, nothing.
You know what, I think they are ashamed now that they saw all these awesome comments and the overwhelming support Blue Abaya has gotten from both locals and expats..
I certainly am overwhelmed by all this, really amazing!!!
Such a great outcome from something so negative!

Layla said...

Francesca-thank you for your comment and hope to see you around!Yup those are some pretty unhappy people!

Layla said...

Karen King-SISU! Ahh the River of Shiz..I love your figure of speech here, it really does run through humanity and I guess some people mind as well..

Layla said...

Satu VW-thank you, I will :)

Layla said...

Sandra DXB-thank you, it's not always easy that's for sure!

Layla said...

erin S lee-thanks for your kind words I felt really touched by them!

Layla said...

bigstick-aww come on man, what did you expect just pure cursing? Isn't it worse when it's more detailed and personal?
Ya AL's comments were unbelievable and to this day I don't understand how he was allowed to call me a prostitute publicly without that comment being moderated, on such a blog you would think it would not pass. but hey at least he's banned now.
Waiting for him to make his way here to share his love.

Layla said...

Diana-I won't! Especially after all these fantastic people like you that commented and made my day :)

Layla said...

aalia-Thank you :)

Layla said...

Umm Arbaa-Define opinionated for me please.
Actually what is wrong with having an opinion?
Why is it wrong to have an opinion on something such as the country I now call home?
Is critique only allowed if it comes from a local?
You think it's best people don't have any opinions at all?
What does that leave?

Oh ya, blindly following brainwashed sheep.

If a Saudi gets offended from my blog then I would just say..Too bad for them. If they can only see negativity here then they have serious issues and should seek help.

Layla said...

Karen King-I would also love to hear what is "allowed" for me to talk about.

Layla said...

MORENA-I love your way of putting it!
The wedding post is almost done, just need a few more days to finish it :)

Layla said...

onesweetchick-thanks!!

Layla said...

Manda-You're welcome:) Tampere RULES (am from Manse myself)
thanks for the comment!

Layla said...

Shannon-Sometimes I find they say that when all else has failed, ie they can't come up with anything smart to say ;)
I have yet to meet a Finn or any other person who agrees 100% with their government and every single rule, legislation and whatever jibberish.

You know what I think keeps up and nourishes this "pack mentality"? Forcing everyone to look the same (black/white) lol

Layla said...

Shannon-thanks for the comments, yes I'm sure many ppl just read one or two posts and then think they have it all figured out..

Layla said...

Louise-I have no idea. As if this country has the world's most amazing perfect legislation.
But you know what, the scary thing is some people here DO think Saudi-Arabia's law is in fact based on ISlam and is thus perfect, infallible and everything MUST be followed Blindly.

THIS is the one of the main problems here :/

Layla said...

JoHanna-You're spot on about us Finns and honesty. It's hard for people who don't know Finnish people personally to understand this aspect of our identity and culture! It's very much a part of my blog and how I write though!
Don't fear, with SISU I will never give up even if some dumbo decides this blog needs to be blocked..I will just open a new one, problem solved hahahaha

Keep visiting ja terkkuja sinne villiin lanteen ;)

Layla said...

Annie-I haven't gotten anything of the likes yet but secretly hoping the haters will return and write more for our entertainment!

But I think it's highly unlikely because they can see all the positive encouraging comments and will feel ashamed and regretful and will apologize for their bad manners and for hurting my feelings.

Ya and cows will fly.

Layla said...

S.B-thanks for the feedback! wth ruined within? Sheesh..the nerve!

bigstick1 said...

Laylah:

You can remove this if you want but I am just curious about what is being said about the recently protests at the university. Here anything?

Back on topic. I really figured you had a couple of ones with some @#@@$!!.

Oh, what finally got AL thrown of besides implying that I was a thin 1" was that he would come over and service my entire family as a house boy of sorts. However, he did go on about the quality of USA manufactured female blowup dolls as well as other USA electronic devices for men only equipment being less than acceptable as other countries made better quality product in this area. Apparently from our conversation he had quite a bit of experience in this field of plastics and assisted devices. If that gives you any indication of how badly his side of the conversation got.

Sandy could not take it anymore and requested he be banned. However, you know me. I enjoyed stirring it up with him. All the while I was very nice. I actually had a blast getting him to show his absolute true, ugly and vile nature.

Here is something I learned a long time ago. Being offended when it comes to words is a choice. So if you chose not to be offended by words then it rolls right off.

Karen King said...

Probably the joys of serving men and children. What else is woman here for?

Unknown said...

LOL My favorite was the one that said that she hated your liberal Islam.

It must be nice to never think for yourself and just find all answers through scholars. I wish I could live in such a small box.

Noor said...

People are crazy and they do this on everyone's blog. I have got a few stupid comments on mine as well and I just say thanks and go on. I refuse to even give them my time or attention since they are obviously jealous to take the time to down me.

Btw I had no idea you were Muslim but I just read that you converted :)

Anonymous said...

I wanted to write something nice too, but all is written above by others :) Be strong Laylah and don't pay your attention to such rubbish opinions. You've been doing great job for all people that want to know closer Saudi culture.
I haven't found anything offensive, ignorant or arrogant in your blog. I have really great pleasure reading regulary your posts.
Greetings from Poland.
Nadia

Annie NJ said...

Way to go Laylah ! I so needed this article, needed this pep talk to deal with similar situations/people as I am sick of weighing myself down with comments and definitions of me that don't define me. Thank you very much. May sound exaggerated, but honestly you are an inspiration. Keep the good work coming. Loving the Blue Abaya !
Lots of love and blessings,
Annie, xo.

Layla said...

Bigstick-lol plastic devices?? Yuck! What a pervert! I hope he never finds an american woman, or any woman! He only deserves the plastic kinds!

Layla said...

Nadia-thanks you and nice to hear from you!

Layla said...

Annie NJ- thanks so much for saying that means a lot to me!!I'm glad it helped you, keep visiting :)

Anonymous said...

This is the first time I comment on you're blog and I have to say that as a Saudi I LOVE it. You remind me sometimes of things my German grandmother has to say about living here lol.

Anonymous said...

it is a shame that some saudi students do not represent the real islam when they are abroad. I think it is because they are not afraid of Allah. If they are afraid of Allah, they will not go chasng their desires. IT is a problem in muslim commumnities nowadays, who do not understand islam, instead they practice islam as a habit. Thanks to Allah, I was raised by my father to practice the real islam, which teaches you to be afraid of Allah whenever and wherever I am. I am livng in he west, where clubs and bars are in a walking distance, but do not go there, because a muslim is a muslim whereever she/he is.

Anonymous said...

Awesome post. Now you need to do one that highlights how your blog has positively affected your female Saudi readers.

Keep the post coming. I find your views honest and informative. I read a previous post where you were ranting and you mentioned making a decision to steal the milk from the milkman out of frustrations. I was so scared for you Laylah! I thought, oh no...they'll send the authorities to chop off her hand.

Aura said...

"Move away if you don't like it here" seems to be a very usual "argument" when someone does not like the criticism. You hear that a lot here in Finland too. If you are unsatisfied with something, they say you should just pack your stuff and leave the town/country. But the problem is that things will never get better if all the critics just remain silent and pretend that everything is okay or if they just leave! And if nothing ever changed we would still be stuck in the Stone Age. Is this what those who resist the progress really want?

And how come there is no such thing as liberal islam? I am not a muslim, but I have known people who are, and they were not fundamentalists but very liberal and ordinary people. But maybe these "better" believers (no matter which religion, you can find these people everywhere) have so miserable lives that their only joy is judging the others.

And I find it kinda funny that this person who said that there is nothing interesting in your blog, still had the motivation to read it and even wrote a comment. :P

Anyway, thank you Laylah for the blog, I find it very interesting! I will continue reading, and I hope you will continue writing!

Terkuin, ateisti Suomesta ;)

Anonymous said...

as salaam o alaikum, i am american and married to a pakistani 24 years now. even after having 5 children i am still treated like dirt by pakistani women who seem to go out of their way to find fault with me. my own people also deal with me like i lost my mind. you are so blessed to still have many friends and a close family. the haters are sick and we must not let them make us sick with them. God bless you

Anonymous said...

Dedicated to all the haters: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7z_ztMxBgk

I love how Katt Williams describes haters. Next time they send you something like that, refer them to this video LOL.

Anonymous said...

Happened to me as well. Just ignore them. They are only Muslims by name (I am referring to those who treat you badly). There is NOTHING Islamic in them.

Anonymous said...

My favorite part of the video the last thing he says: Haters, if you don't have anyone to hate on, please feel free to hate on me. Say my hair ain't luxurious when you know it is b*tch." I love that one!

Dearest Laylah, haters are irrelevant and don't matter.